I can already hear the cries of outrage and the stirring of the angry mob over that fact that I have just purchased and am downloading the international version of Saints Row 4 from the US Playstation Store.
I am risking all that I am to see just what effect this game will have on me. I am risking becoming a junkie because fictional alien narcotics give cartoonish characters super powers. I am risking becoming a menace to society as I have the option to use an equally cartoonish alien weapon that can perform a virtual anal probe on a collection of polygons representing virtual people within a matrix style simulation of a fictional city!
Rest assured reader, I will carefully document what horrific changes occur within my very soul so you can feel safe and reassured when the special Australian release version of the game reaches our shores. You will know just how much the Australian Classification Board is protecting you and your sensitive, fragile adult mind from the horrors of over the top, completely unbelievable video games.
Yes dear reader, I make this ultimate sacrifice for you...
It has nothing to do with allowing me to play a game that is getting excellent reviews, as the developer's wanted us to experience it, almost a month prior to the censored Australian release and costing almost half the price of what it will be once it reaches our shores. Honestly, I don't know how you could even suspect that?
Once I get the opportunity to sit down for a solid play session I will certainly pass on my first impressions, always assuming I'm not trying to score alien narcotics in some dark alley while lying in wait to stick objects up the anal cavities of passers-by.
Wish me luck guys.
Oh and watch this trailer. It is hilarious and Australia gets, well, a special mention.
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